Loss Of A Dear Friend - Mary Jeanne Barker Behrends

Mary Jeanne Barker Behrends April 16, 1963 - November 25, 2011



On November 25, 2011, my dear friend lost her life to cancer. Till the end she told me that she was going to beat it and if anyone could kick that cancer's backside it would had been Mary.

I met Mary in the Singles Ward in the fall of 1989 - right after my Granny Rynders passed away from lung cancer. Mary and I became close friends and she was even my Visiting Teacher (LDS). Mary and I had similar interests: 1) Church; 2) Osmonds and we were both 3) Nerds/Geeks. I could talk "shop" with Mary and she knew exactly what I was talking about. :) We were also close in age - just 9 months apart!

When Mary got married to the first loser, there were several of us that tried to talk her out of it. She didn't listen and married him anyway. She hung on to the hope that the marriage would work for over 18 years, but it ended anyway formally in December 2009. I know the marriage ended many years earlier than that, but Mary was full of hope that things would turn around. It is hard to be married to someone that doesn't have a desire to be married or contribute to the marriage in any way possible.

Mary introduced me to Scott right after I came home from California. It was at Mary's home that I first met Scott, just days after returning home. Mary was also in my wedding party and at my wedding in the Washington DC LDS Temple in 1996.

Mary overcame many obstacles in this life. She had a rough childhood; married a loser of a "man" (and I use that term very loosely); lost a ton of weight (about 80 lbs); remarried to a second loser and obtained a Bachelor and two Master degrees. In the fall of 2010 it looked like her life was turning around. Finished her 2nd Masters and was in a job she loved at Kelly Services in Troy. It was just a few months later that she was diagnosed with colon cancer that had spread to her liver. And it was that cancer that took her life just a little over 11 months later.

When I think of Mary, the first thing that pops into my head is her love for everyone and her positive outlook on life. You can read more on Mary from her very brief blog that she kept:

http://marybehrends.blogspot.com/

I know Mary is in a better place - free from pain. I know she is with her Mom and her other family members that have gone on before her. Even with that knowledge, I still miss her terribly.

Until we meet again, Mary Jeanne!!